We aren't strangers to the 'goat show' world. On average, we try to attend a few in-and-out shows in the area to try to win awards and potential championships to help confirm that we are breeding in the right direction and also increase the value of our animals. This year, two lovely groups of my friends encouraged me to attend and show during the open class at the Lorain County Fair. Rog and I are faithful attendees of the fair for the past 15 years or so, it is one of the largest fairs in the state and takes place in a community local to my practice and to Rog's summer park gig. I've hesitated to attend many fairs, because most require that the animals are present for the entire week, which equals stress, french fries offered by visitors (adults, naturally...), close quarters with other animals that may not lead such a privileged or healthful life and lots of grubby hands that are irresistible to curious goat lips. With Rog already back in school, and offers from my friends to help with feeding and watering while I was at work, I gave in and brought 4 junior does, May, Esmerelda, Sage and Mona Lisa. My dedicated companions also had 4-H duties of their own to perform so they had planned to stay at the fairgrounds all week to facilitate the process and I opted to join them for a few evenings. Here's a little photo journal that sums up the week (not all mine, I was too traumatized to take many pics. Actually I kept my phone tucked away so I wouldn't be tempted to start a gallery of "people of the Lorain County Fair", I have to maintain at least a hint of professionalism while in public)
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| Infamous for causing massive traffic jams in the booming metropolis of Wellington, nearly 130,000 people attended this years fair. | | | |
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I attended my very first pig race. I can't fathom that I made it 35 29 years without witnessing this. The little porkers can fly when there are oreos at the finish line. |
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| The fair provided me much needed quality time with the great love of my life...fried cheese curds. Move over elephant ears, Oh Boys and soggy french fries, you don't hold a candle to these guys. Salty, squeaky, what's not to love? My GI tract is now fully recovered. |
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| The yearly NSTPA (?? ) tractor pull. I made up those initials, lets just say I didn't buy a t-shirt. Every year we go. Every year seems longer and longer. Every tractor looks, sounds, pulls the same with the exception of a few flames and explosions every now and then. Every year the way home is filled with loud gutteral W-W-W-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A's from the drivers seat as we exit the muddy parking lot. Every year I pray for rain. This year, 5 hours in to the event, I found myself unknowingly rocking back and forth RainMan style in my seat out of sheer exhaustion. My eyes must have been involuntarily crossing too b/c noone protested when I politely excused myself to the tent. |
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| A must for fair campground dwellers. Providing endless hours of entertainment to boisterous underage drinkers who call the fairgrounds 'home'. |
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The campgrounds are the picture of organized chaos. With inches to spare, the campers and RV's are organized into cubicles and figure-8 family cliques, generally arranged to seclude the inner circle which may hold anything from an outdoor kitchen, to a couch or a full sized refrigerator, a pool, a dance floor, or all of the above. The tents were few and far between, and we were in one of them, conveniently located near the porta-potties. Now, I'm no stranger to tent camping, and we certainly didn't let the intermittent rain showers dampen our parade. The tent provided a lovely daylight nighttime glow from the giant floodlights overhead that stayed on 24-7. It allowed us to enjoy the many trains that seemingly careened right through our tent until 1am, after which we were granted a reprieve until 5. Each morning the 5am train provided a thorough and reliable alarm clock, I actually woke up running for my life on more than one occasion. |
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| So I admit, our tent probably looked something like this. Aside from forgetting the pump for my air mattress and just rolling it up and sleeping on it, everyone was quite comfortable. |
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| We also had a screened kitchen and dining area where we enjoyed many non-fair-food meals. Ours looked a little different than this, our decorative light fixture and camo chairs helped us blend in. |
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| We did spot this cool bug on our tent. |
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| The other campers decorated their sites as well. |
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| I learned all about the fair 'uniform'. It starts with daisy dukes. It is preferred that the shorts are so short that either the front pockets stick out, butt cheeks stick out in the rear, or both. I was quite comfortable in my Umbro soccer shorts that I've had since high school. |
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| In reality, the scene more closely resembled this. The 'uniform' was favored by everyone, ages 10-70, size 0-20. When paired with a shirt proclaiming ' I pooped today', or 'Slut 1', in a play on Dr. Suess, you truly are at the height of fashion. Some of my favorites were seeing a mustard stained Red Cross 'orgasm donor' t-shirt stretched precariously over a furry bulging belly. Perhaps he should seek out the 'Redneck in Heat' I spotted earlier. I was a bit horrified at seeing a sparkly pink 'Sexy 1' t-shirt on a 12 year-old. Can't wait to watch you on 'Teen Mom'! |
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| So where is mom in all this? Strutting proudly in her daisy duke mom jorts! |
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| Looking for dad. . . |
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| The shorts generally should be paired with cowboy boots. The heels will accentuate your butt and help you look more like a farmer-type. I didn't see many of these beautiful leather boots. |
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| But I saw plenty that resembled these. |
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| Aviators finish the look. |
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| Even the sheep were wearing spandex! What is the world coming to... Seriously, apart from a few spectacular specimens, the crowd was pretty enjoyable. The 4H barns were impeccably clean thanks to the kids on barn duty, the vendors were generally friendly, we spent time with goat friends, old and new. I was able to share the 'farm-side' of my life with co-workers, patients and other members of the community and of course, 'promote the goat' whenever possible. |
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| First year in 4-H, Miss Moon finished 2nd in showmanship in a large class that spanned ages 8-18, very impressive! The accolades continued when her junior alpine, Zaidee was named Reserve Grand Champion in the open class. |
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| Capra Lane BS Sage was named Grand Champion Junior Alpine in a class of nearly 40! This counts as her 'dry' or 'restricted' championship leg. We were very pleased and are excited to see her compete as a senior doe after kidding this spring. |
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| Mona Lisa, too was awarded GCH in the saanen class! She had already earned her dry leg at an earlier show, but still an impressive win. That meant 2 of the 4 Capra Lane does in attendance had to stand in the Best-in-Show lineup at the end of the day! Our Toggs rounded out the day with 3rd and 4th in their class. All in all, a good show for the barn 'newbies' and a very long week for the goats. Sunday couldn't come fast enough... |
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| Goat noses are cute, as far as noses go. Soft, smooth, generally clean. |
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| Not quite as cute when coated in green boogers and hay bits. The fair crud set in by weeks end. It then spread from the goats who attended the fair, to the baby goats that stayed home, and finally one by one through the milkers. Snot, congestion, fever, lethargy...my $50 or so dollars of fair awards was quickly spent on antibiotics for the goats. |
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| The thing with goats is, when they don't feel well, they crash. They whimper and whine, hang their heads with a fixed spacy stare and sometimes play dead. All to screw with their panicky owners. |
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| Just like humans, they need rest to recover. I *hope* I gave my last dose of antibiotics yesterday. A few more days of milk dumping and things will be back to normal around here. So will I bring animals to the fair again? Probably not. I don't have the time or energy to deal with the aftermath. Will I attend the fair again? Of course!!! I'll help with my friends' animals, help during the show, and dutifully sit through yet another tractor pull. I'll fill my gut with cheese curds, cheer on Hilary Rod-HAM Clinton at the pig race and comfortably retire to the tent and enjoy the sights and sounds of the fair. But next year...................I'll know what to wear. |
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